Many of us observe those who appear to be caught up in what we would call addiction, and it can be almost anything: addiction to alcohol, sports, smoking, drugs, shopping, work, gambling, sex, eating and even technologies such as cell phones, TV and computers. Yet, we may neglect to notice we are all, more or less, abusers of our emotions. We have either conditioned ourselves to the numbness of not feeling our emotions at all, or we may habitually run around in circles, desperately clinging to the pattern of creating the same emotional dramas we have been in for years.
Too often we blame something or someone else for the unwanted feelings we have or for the unwanted situations in which we find ourselves. We are quite certain that if “so and so would just _____, or if “this or that would just _____”, my life would be different…I would have made a better decision…I would still trust people…I would be healthier…I would stop smoking…I could be happier, etc.
We morph ourselves into helpless victims, adamant about our right to maintain our thoughts and beliefs as they have always been. Yet the consequence is that we become our own worst enemy.
The insecurity of letting go of who we think we are, that is, who we have learned we are, is so anxiety-provoking for the ego that we would prefer to deceive ourselves so that we may continue to treat ourselves in the same destructive manner.
We would rather do as we have always done in order to experience the “comfort” of being right and the “satisfaction” of being an innocent victim. This is one form of controlling and defending our version of reality. Basically, the ego hates change and is adept at using a variety of strategies in order to survive (maintain its identity). We connect “who we are” with an ego-perception such as, being good at this and not that, being opinionated or not, or being disciplined or not, or being strong or not, and the truth of the question is: “If these principles, opinions and beliefs that make me who I am, are not me, then who am I?”
Too many of us have never learned how to know our true selves. Society, school, culture and our parents had no awareness of their true selves and so, they could not pass on the knowledge. Various thoughts, feelings and opinions have been passed down from generation to generation and that is often the only truth we know. It may have given us a greater understanding of the ego’s reality but it brings us no closer to realizing who we really are.
Many are raised with the concept of “to do” rather than “to be”. We are taught that if something does not work, then we have to do something more. More hard work, more control, more planning, become thinner, smarter, earn more money, and so on. All of this is done with the aim of creating a better life. Eventually, we may come to the conclusion that these ego-strategies do not actually work. With this realization, one is free to create a new openness to acquire different strategies which are beyond the ego. And importantly, beyond the basic fear which characterizes the ego’s perception. This is living beyond your beliefs.
The ego equals fear and the soul equals unconditional love. In our world, these are the two driving forces which create everything there is. We are so used to feeling our fears in one form or another, that we no longer recognize fear when it governs our understanding, our feelings and our actions. It has become “normal” for us to be motivated by our fears. It may be more useful to ask: “Is this coming from a place of unconditional love?” And, if the answer is no, then it must be fear for those are the only two options available.
Most of us know that the ability to love unconditionally is important. We try to share unconditional love with others but typically, we have not yet learned how to love ourselves unconditionally. Loving ourselves has been connected with selfishness or self-absorption, or just being too “full of yourself”. But the most crucial prerequisite to creating a better life, is the ability to love oneself unconditionally and to treat ourselves with the care and respect we would wish to give others.
You choose to carry a big load when you tell yourself, in whatever form it takes, that you are “not enough”. To think in such a way deflates your energy level, as well as your ability to love and be loved. This creates the side-effect of you desperately needing others to love you. Yet if another does claim to love you, deep down you do not believe it because you “know” better. This creates all sorts of problems in relationships.
- S/he must be a fool
- S/he has not yet discovered the truth about you
- S/he wants something from you
- S/he is lying
The Heart Technique promotes the opportunity for you to easily grant yourself the love and compassion that may be missing in your life. This results in reduced feelings of lack or unwanted dependence in order to feel happy and at peace.
This does not mean that as you begin to grow spiritually, you will suddenly wake up into a whole new reality where life tosses you nothing but rose petals and bright red balloons. Perhaps different feelings and memories will pop up. Some people will experience previously suppressed fear that they were not able to face at the time it was originally caused. Although some fears may surface, they can be experienced with more ease and grace now. You dare to feel on a deeper level. A better soul-contact permits you to experience the friendship, the love, the compassion and the absence of judgment which are so necessary for the automatic healing of painful emotions.
You will begin to experience just how much inner strength, joy and gratitude begins to blossom from the letting go of resistance – feeling and accepting all the energy we call emotions.
Inside every hurricane is the eye of the hurricane; that still, silent core of energy. At the core beneath every feeling you will find God, your soul, your higher true self. The path that leads you there travels through your emotions. It goes through giving yourself unconditional love, compassion, and the absence of judgments.
Through the acceptance of your “humanness” and all that it implies, you can see it is merely your ego which forms your perceptions of the world. The eternal part of you, your soul, is directly behind that perception.
If looking for true peace, know the solution will not be found in the world of doing, but rather at the level of being. Peace is to be found at the inner realm and not in the outer world. Peace resides in the quietness of your mind, in the letting go of the stress accumulated within your nervous system. This is the transition from ego-perception to soul-perception. (1st and 2nd part of the Heart Technique)
The solution also lies in changing your inner dialog into that which brings forth who you really are, rather than having your mind habitually looping around thoughts and opinions which are no more than illusions, driven by fear. ( 3rd part of the Heart Technique)
Inner peace results from raising your energy vibration, so that you attract a higher vibration which gets reflected back into your world. This brings you more and more into alignment with who you are and with what you came here to be, to experience and to contribute. (4th part of the Heart Technique)
Peace lies in gratitude for the life you have and those opportunities for creating the perception of the world through which you would wish to experience reality. (5th part of the Heart Technique)
The Heart Technique is a thirty-five minute daily program that gives you the unique tools to advance further and further toward the core of your inner-being, your soul. This brings you closer to the direct experience of unconditional love, acceptance, trust and the absence of judgment toward yourself and others; from perceiving through the limited awareness of the ego-self to your unlimited higher-self.
Article written by
Founder of the Heart Technique
Psychologist and Healer
For more information about the Heart Technique please visit: www.HeartTechnique.com